pump boats at Ortiz in Iloilo
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Guimaras-Iloilo Boatmen Shocked by Surprise Drug Test

The Panay News had some attention-grabbing news recently. Subjected to a shock were local boatmen in Guimaras, our island province. Scheduled at 9:00 am this…

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Iloilo City Red Horse Beer Disaster

It was a catastrophe of Biblical proportions and will go down in history as the “Iloilo City Red Horse Beer Disaster.” The Panay News ran…

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red horse beer
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How to Get Killed in the Philippines in 5 Easy Steps

I’ve lived in the Philippines with my awesome asawa for over eight years. My only duties involve boiling hot water for our coffee and tea…

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aswang
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Is Our Filipina Maid an Aswang?

My asawa and I retired to the Philippines almost eight years ago. We’ve dealt with a myriad of devils and demons in this Southeast Asian…

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a look at our pool and our new home in the philippines
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Can Foreigners Own Property in the Philippines?

Want to start a fistfight with your expat friends in the Philippines? Start discussing the issue of foreign land ownership in the archipelago. Like religion…

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Guimaras Comfort Room
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The Whole Poop & Nothing But(t) the Poop

If you’re about to sit down to a meal while you’re reading this, be forewarned, you might not have the stomach for this post. “The…

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old fart relaxing in boracay
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Unlimited 3-Day Weekends in the Philippines

My friends in the United States recently finished celebrating Labor Day. I used to look forward to the three day holiday when I worked at…

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Jeff MD Kapre e
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A Kapre Lives in Old Mango Tree in my Asawa’s Elementary School Yard in Guimaras

A  Kapre lives in an old mango tree in my asawa’s elementary school in Guimaras, the island province of the Philippines we call home. According…

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balut
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If You’re Pregnant in the Philippines, Don’t Eat Balut

Take some advice from the crusty old expat.

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the guimaras swat team
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I Join the Guimaras SWAT Team at Manggahan

Could the aging kano be pressed into service as a member of the local SWAT Team?

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filipino execution squad
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Philippine Government to Execute All Fixers

In an effort to stamp out corruption in the Philippines, all fixers will be executed.

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The Royal Court
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I Award the Barangay Queen Her Trophy at Local Barangay Fiesta

We were given the red carpet treatment at a local fiesta.

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Headless Ghost in Barong Visits Our Nephew at The Farm

Our nephew has seen a headless torso in a barong tagalog.

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dolphin dumagete
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Most Affordable Places to Retire in the World: Dumaguete, Philippines

I could become suave, sophisticated and debonair if I lived in Dumaguete. Are you kidding me?

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