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Fri. May 14th, 2021
pump boats at Ortiz in Iloilo

The Panay News had some attention-grabbing news recently. Subjected to a shock were local boatmen in Guimaras, our island province. Scheduled at 9:00 am this past Tuesday meeting was a meeting for all motorboat crews at the Buenavista wharf. However, imagine their surprise when the boat teams discovered they had to submit their urine for a random drug test.

Guimaras-Iloilo Boatmen Shocked by Surprise Drug Test

I imagine some of the crew members had been standing around smoking a cheap Fortune brand cancer stick waiting for the “meeting” to begin.

Crews from the 56 motorboats plying the Guimaras-Iloilo route were probably joking around with other outfits. They might have been comparing notes and exchanging tall tales as males have a tendency to do at times. Perhaps a few were even nursing a Red Horse headache from a local fiesta the night before.

However, their jovial mood was suddenly shattered when the Buenavista Municipal Health Office informed the boatmen of the “meeting’s” real purpose. As piss cups were passed around, the crew members realized they had been duped.

Buenavista Guimaras

No Warning

There was no warning system in place as is the case whenever the Philippine National Police, PNP, run a checkpoint on our island province for erring motorcyclists and jeepney operators. Certainly most of the crews had been caught with their pants down, so to speak.

“We only tested 125 out of over 200 boatmen,” said Senior Inspector Jefrey Ferrer, Buenavista police chief.

Narrow plank to the Buenavist boat

All tested negative for illegal drug use.

Ferrer said the test was part of the Buenavista police’s and local government unit’s efforts to keep the municipality drug-free.

The next target for drug testing are motorcycle and jeepney drivers, said Ferrer.

I’m really interested in hearing what happens when the local motorcyclists and jeepney drivers are tested for drugs.

Will all of them be drug-free as was the case for the boatmen? Or will they be tipped off and scatter like desperate cockroaches when the lights go on?

By The Kano

POST AUTHOR: "THE KANO." Dave DeWall, "The Kano", is the Publisher & Editor-in-Chief of "Philippines Plus" in publication since August 2009. He is also the CEO of Lizard Poop Productions and author of the best-selling guide book "The Philippines Expat Advisor." Dave moved to the Philippines in July 2009 from Central Illinois with his lovely wife of over 21 years, "The Sainted Patient Wife." The couple reside in a rural province in Western Visayas, Guimaras. The small island province is said to have the sweetest mangoes in the world. They do not have any children but are the proud owners of eight active canines, including a Belgian Malinois called "Killer" "Killer" has bitten five people over the years along with one goat and a carabao. "Killer" doesn't like strangers. Or goats. Or carabaos.

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