“Her Mother-in-Law is an Aswang”

aswang

(Aswang graphic: Travis Simmons, Author of Wyrd Fiction)

We recently encountered a roadblock in our search for a new domestic helper in the Philippines. Our current 17-year-old helper is leaving tomorrow. She’s pregnant. The young girl must have gotten knocked up on a Sunday, her day off,  as no one at our home in the archipelago is thankfully not responsible for the Filipina’s condition.  A distant neighbor brought over a prospective new employee yesterday. But there’s a problem with this lady: her mother-in-law is an aswang.

 

 

ATTACK OF THE ASWANG

 

It’s been over seven years since I first posted an article about an aswang which attacked my asawa’s family. An Aswang is a shapeshifting monster usually possessing a combination of the traits of either a vampire, a ghoul, a warlock/witch, or different species of werewolf in Filipino folklore or even all of them together. (Source: Wikipedia.)

I personally am not surprised that mother-in-law’s could in fact be confused with a witch. My own Filipina mother-in-law, seen below, cannot speak or read English so I fear no repercussions from the above statement (unless she, too, is really an aswang.)

 

Not the Loco loco lola, this is the famed Giant Lizard Killer

 

Now I was not aware that the new job candidate had any connections to the dark side. The neighbor that introduced us to her did not mention this.  But the new prospect was 50 years old so chances of her getting pregnant were reasonably slim.

My wife asked me what I thought.

“Hire her, “ I advised, “if you think she can do the work. You do need the help.”

 

THE ASWANG CONNECTION

Another neighbor, however, ratted out our potential new helper yesterday after discovering that the woman was to start work for us today.

The neighbor was pregnant several years ago. She received a visit one day from the alleged aswang. The pregnant neighbor’s husband secured their roof as everyone knows that an aswang is capable of ripping the roof off one’s home, much like a tornado in a trailer park.

It wasn’t long before the couple heard a large thud outside their house one night. It sounded like some creature had landed right outside their bedroom window.

Shortly thereafter tragedy struck the family. The woman soon gave birth but sadly lost her child a few days after childbirth.

The last visitor to the house before the child was born? You guessed it. The Filipina said to be an aswang.

 

OUR NEW EMPLOYEE?

 

Now my wife had some reservations about having a helper in our home whose mother-in-law has been tagged as an aswang. Our new helper was to begin work this morning. She didn’t show up.

The distant neighbor that introduced us to the woman said she was to have met our prospective new employee at a nearby church. She never showed up.

Did the Filipina’s mother-in-law have something to do with this? Maybe the woman pissed off her mother-in-law and whisked her away.

Who knows? But we do, however, have a new employee. The distant neighbor that introduced the lady with the aswang mother-in-law. The Filpina’s husband was recently injured in a motorcycle accident and can’t work. Why she did not first ask for a job is beyond me. But I haven’t heard yet if her mother-in-law is an aswang so her status at this time is strictly probationary.

Author: The Kano

POST AUTHOR: "THE KANO." Dave DeWall, "The Kano", is the Publisher & Editor-in-Chief of "Philippines Plus" in publication since August 2009. He is also the CEO of Lizard Poop Productions and author of the best-selling guide book "The Philippines Expat Advisor." Dave moved to the Philippines in July 2009 from Central Illinois with his lovely wife of over 19 years, "The Sainted Patient Wife." The couple reside in a rural province in Western Visayas, Guimaras. The small island province is said to have the sweetest mangoes in the world. They do not have any children but are the proud owners of eight active canines, including a Belgian Shepherd called "Killer" "Killer" has bitten five people in the last two years along with one goat and a carabao. "Killer" doesn't like strangers. Or goats. Or carabaos.