Duwende are little creatures who can provide good fortune or bad fate to humans, and they reside in the Philippines. According to Wikipedia, duwendes frequently live in houses, in trees, underground, termite like mounds or hills, and in rural areas. They also live near wells as my wife's younger sister has had some unpleasant encounters with the creatures in the past. The little goblins are also usually invisible, at least in rural Guimaras. (However, one day while shopping at a garden center in Lowes back at the States some years ago, my wife saw a white-bearded lawn gnome statue adorned with a red cap and said that it looked exactly like a duwende. )
Getting ready to go to the SM Business Service Center in Iloilo City the other morning to pick up my asawa's NSO certified copies of our marriage certificate and her birth certificate. I only packed two pairs of my favorite Levi's in a balikbayan box my wife and I sent to our new home at "The Compound" from the States. I wear cargo shorts around the house, but don't like to show off my dazzling white legs when we make the trip to the big city of Iloilo.
I reached in our wardrobe dresser to get my pants which I had just saw my asawa place there a couple of days ago. No pants to be found. I looked in another part of the wardrobe where my wife has most of her clothes hanging up (I am only allotted a couple of slots) to see if my other pair of Levis could be there. ) Nope, no pants there either, just a bunch of dresses and outfits not fit for a macho guy like me to wear in public. I haven't embraced the ladyboy thing, yet. My wife was in the room putting on her warpaint.
- "Have you seen my pants?" I asked.
- " I just put a pair in there the other day!" was her reply.
- "I know. I saw you put them away, but I can't find them!" said I.
- "Well, what happened to them?" I asked as my wife proceeded to take all of my clothes out of the wardrobe and go through every piece of my clothing trying to find my missing Levis.
- "The duwende stole your pants!" she said in all seriousness.
Great! It was already nine o'clock, and a frickin' duwende had taken my Levis. I knew better to disagree with my asawa, but I said that maybe my extra pair of pants might be in the laundry basket. She checked. No, no Levis there, either. I suggested she check with her Mom, "The Feared Giant Lizard Killer," who sometimes folds our clothes and brings them to our room (yeah, I know, I have a tough life.) So my asawa leaves the room, and I have no alternative but to wear a pair of my cargo shorts and show off my absolutely stunning, white, hairy legs in public. As I'm taking my shower, I hear my wife call out to me.
- "I found a pair of your pants!"
- "Where?" I inquire as I open the CR door a crack and grab my beloved Levis.
- "They were in the back nipa hut drying. They're still a little damp." my boss replies. (When it is rainy at "The Compound" in Guimaras clothes are taken inside to the back nipa hut to dry.)
- "So the duwende didn't take them?" I ask.
- "Not this time!" my asawa answers.
So I put on my pants, and arrive in SM City and thankfully, the duwende had not taken the NSO copies of my our marriage certificate and her birth certificate. I guess the guard armed with the shotgun, that I gave my receipt and ID for the paperwork to, scared off the mischievous little rascals. Otherwise, I would have had to blame it on the duwende!