OK, it’s not the most original title, but Guimaras’ “Manggahan Festival 2018 going to the Dogs” best describes yesterday’s premier late afternoon event. It’s the eighth celebration of the sweetest mangoes in the world that The Sainted Patient Wife and I have attended. This is the first pooch program we’ve gone to.
The cancellation of the visit from our island province’s resident computer god saved me a few pesos. Panoy, is known throughout the land of sweet mangoes, Guimaras, for his computer savvy. The tech wizard could have solved my problem with Globe quicker than a young boy can wipe snot off his nose with a shirtsleeve.
Puerto Princesa Palawan Paradise. Some mortals claim the Philippines is a heavenly utopia. Paradise, if you will. I retired to this archipelago over seven years ago. Paradise, it ain’t.
A Kapre lives in an old mango tree in my asawa’s elementary school in Guimaras, the island province of the Philippines we call home. According to Wikipedia, a Kapre is a Philippine mythical creature that could be characterized as a tree demon. It is described as being a tall (7 to 9 ft), dark, muscular creature. Kapres are normally described as having a strong smell that would attract human attention. After a sweaty day in the archipelago, I sometimes have a strong smell that repels human attention.
Yes, an American ambassador shows up at the SPED Christmas Pageant in Guimaras, the island province in Western Visayas known for the sweetest mangoes in the world. The “ambassador,” an American expat living in the Philippines, and his charming wife, were escorted to front row choice seats by no less than Principal Daisy A. Solis, San Miguel Central School’s esteemed leader.
The Filipino Savings Account: Carabaos, Cows & Chickens. You could throw pigs into that mix, also.
Sometimes it’s tough being an American expat in the Philippines. I’m married to a lovely, loving, loyal Filipina wife and surrounded by some of the most beautiful exotic women and sexy girls on the face of this whirling globe we call Earth. I’m treated like a celebrity and have absolutely no household chores. We have a maid now. While I’m not living in paradise, I’m not too far from it. We even have less brownouts since moving back to Guimaras, our home province, last October, than we ever had before. What more could I guy want, other than a COLD bottle of San Miguel Pale Pilsen.