Any notion knocking around inside my fat head that I’m living in paradise is usually shattered by a visit to any local government office. “Philippines Vehicle Registration Ruckus” is a prime example. While I had hopes that an insurance agent in Guimaras, the island province we call home, could assist us, our “fixer” was woefully unable to assist us.
It’s fiesta time at our sleepy barangay on the island province of Guimaras. When I first heard my asawa mention that it was time for their annual celebration, I scratched my head (not my butt this time) and wondered out loud: “Why was an Asian country celebrating what I thought was a Mexican tradition?”
I am delighted to report that my 2015 Annual Report this year at my local Iloilo Immigration Office was a positive experience. My asawa and I had come in from the pump boat from Guimaras, the island province we reside on, to meet an attorney who could do the title transfer for property we have purchased in Guimaras. Since our dock, Ortiz, was fairly near the Immigration Office and it was almost 7:30 am, the time the office would open, I decided we could drop in and do my Annual Report as a foreigner living in the Philippines.
Sometimes it’s tough being an American expat in the Philippines. I’m married to a lovely, loving, loyal Filipina wife and surrounded by some of the most beautiful exotic women and sexy girls on the face of this whirling globe we call Earth. I’m treated like a celebrity and have absolutely no household chores. We have a maid now. While I’m not living in paradise, I’m not too far from it. We even have less brownouts since moving back to Guimaras, our home province, last October, than we ever had before. What more could I guy want, other than a COLD bottle of San Miguel Pale Pilsen.
If you want to retire and live in the Philippines, be prepared for an extremely different culture than you might be used to if you come from a Western culture. “Filipino Time,” which basically means something gets done when it gets done, is in full force and ingrained in the very fabric of the nation.
American Expat in the Philippines. Iloilo City. Retired. Lazy. Everybody does everything for me. Well, almost everything. I do pee on my own. Living in “paradise.” Getting older. The Black Forest cake from the Red Ribbon bakery at SM City (see next photo) was purchased by my asawa to celebrate my recent 61st birthday. But I don’t mind getting older. I’m one step closer to collecting my Social Security.
Ten bucks. 340 pages. No hype. No bull. I'm talking about my new E-book, "The Philippines Expat Advisor." Why advisor? Because that's what I try to do. I endeavor to inform, amuse and advise my readers that are interested in moving to the Philippines or already living in this archipelago. I'm no intellectual. If you've read my stuff for awhile, you're already aware of that.
Brownouts in the Philippines, including Iloilo where we reside, are as common as cockfights. You might be in the middle of checking to see if you have any new Facebook friends on your pc, watching your favorite rerun of Darna on the Fox Filipino channel or sitting in your favorite talabahan enjoying a brew (or two) when the lights go out.
My last post dealt with a personal list of my "Top Ten Tips" on moving to the Philippines and advice on what to do once you arrive. I covered the first five points previously. Here's my take on the next five tips. Remember, if you have any tips of your own, please feel free to drop a comment.
Received an interesting email the other day forwarded by Farkus from Fargo. "Dave, enjoy reading your adventures in the Philippines. They provide me with a laugh occasionally, and if you've ever spent a winter in Fargo you can use all the laughs you can get. I have a question for you. I know you touched on the topic of Duwendes in the Philippines before, but to your knowledge, do duwendes eat pan de sal?"