From the Midwest redneck author of "The Rooster Crows at 4am!," "Lizard Poop!," and "The Philippines Expat Advisor"
Single Guy in the Philippines? Hire a Wingman!
Are you a single guy living in the Philippines? I'm specifically addressing the foreigners and expats living in this archipelago of 7,107 islands. Maybe you're doing all right with the ladies, such as my friend Scott B, who recently accompanied us on a recent trip to Guimaras. But let me tell you about a new expat friend that I've also recently met that needed the help of a wingman. Let's call this new amigo "Jim."
A wingman is a role that a person may take when a friend needs support with approaching the ladies for a date. A guy you bring along that helps you out with the women. He's a man that supports another in approaching a desirable women.
Now I'm not talking about meeting a "GRO," “Guest Relations Officer," probably found in every province throughout the Philippines. I've never been to the Karaoke bars or other joints these ladies hang out at, but I know they're as plentiful as bribes in a barangay.
I received an email from "Jim" the other, bemoaning the fact that he wasn't meeting any nice Ilongga ladies in Iloilo. I took it upon myself to help the guy. He just wanted to find someone that he could take out to a restaurant occasionally or go to the beach with.
Jim is 57. Seems to be a nice guy. I was willing to help him out. So while my asawa was bringing my twin nieces, Michelle and April, to apply for a couple of call center jobs in Iloilo City, a plan hatched inside my crazy head.
I went to a dating website and made a profile for Jim. I simply left messages for several ladies inviting them to meet Jim at the local McDonald's at a certain date and time. What could I lose? I hoped my expat friend wouldn't be pissed, but I wanted to see how my experiment would work out.
Met Jim at the eatery yesterday. Told him what I had done. Thankfully, he wasn't upset with me. First lady was going to show up at 1 pm. She arrived five minutes early. Had a problem. She didn't look anything like her profile picture. I could tell my friend wasn't very happy.
After a few awkward moments, the Filipina pulls out a brochure for the real estate company she works for. It's a large subdivision in Iloilo City located near our rental home. I took the brochure from her and said I would discuss it with my asawa.
The sales agent then excused herself saying she had to meet a friend that just messaged her. Hmmmm, smart girl. Sounded like the pre-arranged text message to bail a girlfriend out of an uncomfortable situation. This smart Filipina had her own "wingman."
Another pinay, in her early 30's, was scheduled to meet my single expat friend at two pm. Hopefully the next meeting would work out better. Two o'clock passed. We waited another 15 minutes and decided to visit "The Moon Cafe." I wanted to introduce my friend to the Mexican-inspired food there. My attempt at being a wingman wasn't going very well.
As we walked outside, a cute Filipina accompanied by a younger lady, blurted out "Jim" as we passed by. It was the young woman that was supposed to meet Jim at two. She was running late, or just practicing "Filipino Time."
I can assure you that my amigo was quite pleased with this pretty pinay. I immediately suggested that the two exchange phone numbers. I asked her if she would like to go to a movie sometime with my American friend. She was agreeable. My wingman status was immediately elevated. She and the young lady with her, a sister, then said their "good-byes" and hopped on a jeepney.
I had been at SM Department Store in Iloilo earlier in the day buying a new pair of inside slippers. My asawa and twin nieces were at home assisting our "hot" laundry lady. I passed by the cosmetic counter where a cute Filipina sales girl said to me; "Good morning, sir! How are you today?"
I stopped. "Have I chatted with you, before?" She looked familiar, but in all honesty, I sometimes have difficulty telling the sales associates at SM apart from one another.
- "Yes, sir. I was pregnant but I'm back to work."
- "YOU were pregnant. OK, I remember you. But you are so thin now. Do you have a boyfriend or asawa? " I asked.
- "No, sir." (The boyfriend that fathered her child had left.)
- "Would you like to meet an American friend of mine that lives here?" I inquired.
- "Yes, sir, " was her reply.
- "I'm meeting him later today. We'll stop by and I'll introduce him to you." I advised her.
Next post I'll tell you how the meeting with this single mom went, plus I'll relate our meeting with a Magnolia "chick" working at the SM Supermarket.