From the Midwest redneck author of "The Rooster Crows at 4am!," "Lizard Poop!," and "The Philippines Expat Advisor"
Cold Beer and Hot Chicks in the Philippines
BBQ Chicken. The Island Cove Resort in Guimaras. Over 90 minutes had passed since my asawa placed my order for the bird. I was already irked since our favorite beach resort in the Philippines, Raymen Beach, was full this past Maundy Thursday upon our arrival in the mango province. I've been retired for over three years now and have lived in the Philippines since July 2009 with my beautiful asawa. Life is good. But when my ample belly is desiring some food, I get grumpy no matter where I am. 
By this time our guests from America, Marilyn and Andy, had been served their dishes along with The Sainted Patient Wife. But my fowl food was going to be delayed another 30 minutes. Frustrated, I told our server to cancel my order. My asawa had pushed some fried rice my way and I emptied the rest of our Coke, so I was going to skip lunch and enjoy the cold beer and the pretty pinays parading up and down the white sandy beaches of Island Cove.
While my wife and our visitors headed out for a swim after their long-delayed lunch, I stayed at our rented table in the shade and decided to pass the time capturing the following photos. I can't swim, can't even float, so why not down a few cold bottles of San Miguel Pale Pilsen and enjoy the day taking some pictures for my website like the following photo of a pretty pinay?
The photo above depicts the roaming ice cream selling some of his chilled treats on a hot day at the beach in the Philippines.
This young lady received cheers from her nearby co-workers when she delivered this heavy container of water.
Look out for duwendes that were roaming this Philippines beach resort. 
This pretty pinay was at the next table trying to put her little one down for a nap.
For the ladies, here's a trio of Filipino guys walking the beach at the Island Cove Resort in Guimaras.
Here's the "kiss me" girl again, leaving the beach after a day of fun in the sun in the Philippines.
And here's our guests, Andy, along with my asawa in the middle, and Marilyn, Andy's spouse. I went over to the Raymen Beach side and got some tasty banana que for everyone as we waited for our driver to take us to the Shirven Hotel in Guimaras where we stayed the night.
A good day with some great friends. And I met some new friends, the family from Iloilo that you see in the first photo. Friendly folks who were at an adjacent table and who graciously posed for the photo. Retirement in the Philippines. You can't beat it!
Good story, good pictures, thank you. Sorry about the chicken. Makes me excited for our vacation to the Philippines next January!!
Great story Dave. Boy you looked relaxed. Then again you always looked relaxed, you lucky dog.
A editorial commet if I may to those following in your footsteps. One of the shockers to me about the Philippines is the lack of public(free) parks. If you want to go on a picinic or a family outing you usually have to go to one of these resorts that Dave is refering to. We go to Tagatay all of the time and rent a large house with a swimming pool, shaded patio, several bedrooms and the manditory Karioke machine. The house also comes with the live in family who cooks, cleans and basically runs the place while your there. We even went to a famous church north of Manila once, really nice place with large grounds of gardens and such. We had to rent a “nipa” style hut/picinic table for our lunch. Bottom line is I have learned that in the Philippines its all about the “peso”. If someone can make a buck off something they will. An adjustment I had to make. Thanks Dave!
Thanks, Lee. Hope the time flies for you. More stories and pictures coming up. Sweet corn ice cream, “Happy Horse,” beer and more cute Filipinas from the Manggahan Festival. Brother, if you’re reading this and have never been to the Philippines what are you waiting for?
Thanks for the info, Scott h. You make an excellent point. You would be hard pressed to find many free public parks in the Philippines and might have to go to a resort such as Scott mentioned. I was blown away by the excellent parks that our subdivision here maintains. It’s like a little slice of the States but it’s not a public park. You’d have to go through several layers of armed guards to get to it.
And if someone can make a buck off of something, they absolutely will, like Scott mentioned.You have to be resourceful. How many of you guys out there back in the States have a “pig slop” boy that roams through your subdivision every morning on his pedicab? This teenager, along with his younger brother, collects garbage left out hanging in a pail by some residents and is collected to feed a local pig farmer’s swine. Only in the Philippines.
I lived in the United States for 64 years and lived in many states. Not once did I ever find a “free” park. Someone paid for the land and most of the time it was you “Mr. Taxpayer.”
As for the “pig slop boy.” Yep they have them in the States too. The problem is most people just toss their food waste away.
Things are different in the Philippines that is for sure. Some things are better here, some are not…at least in our Kano eyes.
Sorry about your chicken BBQ Dave. Do they let you bring in your own cooked food?? It is pretty hard to eat TOO much chicken! I raised my own chickens in Kansas and Michigan. Very good eating! KFC? Not as good as home cooked. Yes we have a KFC here in Tagum City now. Still waiting on Pizza Hut.
BTW – Last time I went to the beach here it didn’t take long for my white skin to turn RED!! OUCH!!!!
Good point, Gary, our tax dollars do go to support the public parks back in the States. But I am amazed that you have encountered “pig slop boys” in the States. I come from Central Illinois but never ran into any. I must have led a sheltered life.
The resort will let you bring in food but since we thought we were going to nearby Raymen Beach which has some good cheap food delivered to your table by a cheerful staff, we did not bring any grub along. Raymen has instituted a “corkage” fee and now charges for bringing chow in, but with their reasonable prices it’s a lot less hassle to let them do the cooking for you.
Gary, I love KFC and our Pizza Hut. We get the P99 special which includes a deep dish personal pan pizza drink and two other items. Tastes good, great price. Sorry to hear about your burn. With this hot summer sun, it’s hard on our lighter kano skin.
Again I’m jealouse Dave, looks like you had fun!
Dave,
Sorry to hear about your BBQ’d Chicken. The main thing is that the beer was flowing. I can imagine how your mood would have been w/o any SMB lol. Love those photos also. Looking forward to the next article. By the way looks like you did a great job with the Boracay/Tagaytay Properties Ad. Carlo is very happy with it. He thinks alot of you. Take care and be safe.
Thanks, PapaDuck. The next article will feature “Fearless Frank” from Florida as we party at the MANGGAHAN FESTIVAL 2012 in Guimaras. “Chickboy” Frank really attracts the ladies.
I’m glad Carlo is happy with the new ad for the Boracay,Tagaytay properties. I appreciate the business. Hope the ad will generate some solid leads and sales for him.
You know we always have fun around here, Jeff.
There is nothing in my book that matches a fun filled day at a Philippine beach resort. A camera just cannot capture the sights, sounds, and smiles of life’s simplicity at it’s best!
You’re right, Randy. Just spent a day at Raymen Beach with a new friend from Canada, Allen. I’ll have more details on the visit in a future post. Always more fun in the Philippines.
Dave,
This was a new one on me, but i met the couple at the Farmhouse. I think they were previewing bamboo furniture.
I finished with my PRE-OP stuff Yesterday, I will admit that i am apprehensive about the surgery. I am hoping that it will return me to me HAPPY, Fearless Self !
I really miss everyone there, and feel like a Stranger here now.
Take Care Always
Frank
We miss you, too, Frank and hope all goes well for you. We’re awaiting your return. Went to Raymen Beach yesterday. A good-looking single guy like you would have had a blast.
Lots of attractive and friendly Filipinas were there with a large contingent of Korean visitors, also. I’ll be doing a post on it soon. Take care.