Grandma Kills the Lizard

A few blogs ago I told the story about the big lizard in the kitchen which my wife was able to coax back outside of an open kitchen window. We have no window screens here. The lizard, called tuko, or gecko to us, made another appearance the other night during a “brown out” (don’t call them “blackouts” here, and we have about five or six a week, on one day alone a few weeks ago we had five. ) The tuko calls at night with “tuko…tuko…tuko!” I tell you, it sounds like something the size of an alligator when you hear it outside your window at night. Actually it gets to maybe 10 to 12 inches in length, and maybe 5 inches in width, but when you first see that thing in your house, and you are not used to seeing such a creature in your home, it does give you a bit of a jolt.

Seems the tuko hangs out (or did hang out) on a coconut tree right outside our house. When it rains hard they like to come inside. They do bite, but I understand that the bite barely penetrates the skin, if at all. Frankly, I don’t want the thing to bite me!

The Philippines Expat Advisor - Grandma Kills the Lizard

So the other night when all the lights are completely out due to the “brown out”, (it’s not like we have street lights here anyway), the tuko that escaped the other night crawled in thru my mother-in-law’s bedroom window. She got up, grabbed her bolo (machete that she keeps by her side at night), and killed the tuko with a couple of whacks. Now my mother-in-law, grandma, or “lola” as they call grandmas here, is 77 years old, about 5 ft. tall in heels, and weighs maybe 85 lbs., if that much. She gets up at 4 am everyone morning to say her prayers, and faithfully has her prayer session every evening around 6 pm, and goes to mass religiously. She is a very devout Catholic, and a very mild-mannered lady. I guess there’s another side of her that I didn’t know.


Author: The Kano

POST AUTHOR: "THE KANO." Dave DeWall, "The Kano", is the Publisher & Editor-in-Chief of "Philippines Plus" in publication since August 2009. He is also the CEO of Lizard Poop Productions and author of the best-selling guide book "The Philippines Expat Advisor." Dave moved to the Philippines in July 2009 from Central Illinois with his lovely wife of over 19 years, "The Sainted Patient Wife." The couple reside in a rural province in Western Visayas, Guimaras. The small island province is said to have the sweetest mangoes in the world. They do not have any children but are the proud owners of eight active canines, including a Belgian Shepherd called "Killer" "Killer" has bitten five people in the last two years along with one goat and a carabao. "Killer" doesn't like strangers. Or goats. Or carabaos.

6 thoughts on “Grandma Kills the Lizard

  1. Thanks Ruth Ann. Good to hear from you. I DO have an extended family and everyone is good to me so I am pretty fortunate. Take care.

  2. Hi I am looking for a cool type of lizard. One that is really active and is not nocturnal. One that is nice to the owner and other people.

Leave a Reply